A post in which I pretend not to know what to write...

I am genuinely stuck for something to write today, but I will - in the Grand Tradition - muddle through and hope that it does not all end in tears, hurt feelings or someone with an eye out of its socket.  Although, if you make it to the end there are tears of joy involved.

I will admit that I briefly contemplated a bitter tirade.  A "two-fingers up at St. Valentine's Day" kind of post.  It was probably going to involve cheap gags and puns and no small amount of sarcasm.   But, then I thought better of it.  I do tirades badly and I won't lower myself to such depths.  Besides which, circulating the globe will be millions of similar such warped and twisted commentaries which I am sure will do a more than adequate job of communicating a lot of what I generally feel about the said event.  In fact, they'll probably do a better job of it than I might, so I think I will outsource my post to them - in true 21st Century fashion. 

I considered a lazy (there's no point hiding it, folks) post which would have simply been a link to the skit that Bill Bailey - British musician/comic for those across the waters who are busily engaged writing my St. Valentine's Day post for me - does about Argos.  Cliff's Chav Haiku prompted it.  I should explain.  Argos isn't only a historical city in Greece, the dog in Homer's Odyssey and a ship-builder who had very limited naming skills. Ergo Argo (always wanted to say that). 

Argos is also a shop here in the UK which is based on the simple premise that you browse by means of in-store catalogues, choose your desired items from said catalogues, and then purchase said items in the shop.  It's mail order, without the mail part, really. You browse, you choose, you order, you wait, you anticipate and you salivate (possibly).  And then, 'ello and behold onto your hats and fasten your mental safety belts, your item appears in front of you on the counter, NOT on your doorstep 28 days later. If you have been paying any attention at all, you will have realised that this part is crucial.  If you've not been paying any attention at all, then I am at a loss. Truly.

Well, I have done so much groundwork to actually present and explain all of this that I feel I might as well just post the video now.  It does not actually feel slapdash and lazy after all this preamble. "Preamble!" I hear you cry.  Either that or someone living not too far from me has chosen a strange name for their dog. "Preamble!" I hear you cry.  That was the preamble equivalent of running the London Marathon in preparation for a 2-minute walk to Tesco... or even to Argos.  Okay, well, smoothly back on subject and without any further ado, I present to you the very chewable Bill Bailey waxing lyrically on Argos...

Bill Bailey - Argos

You're right.   Of course you are.

Such a build-up for something so short-lived...

... but I've been very tired and stressed lately. 

Can we try again in a little while?